| This was not the post I planned to share this week, but life got in the way a bit! My mum fell and broke her hip last week, so I have had an unexpected trip back to the UK and I am very grateful I could be here to help out a bit as she recovers. This week has been another stark reminder of the fragility of life. How things are ever changing, but also how an event can put life as we know it at a bit of a standstill and then we have to pivot. It has made me particularly reflect on a few things which including some questions for us all to ponder on, whether our lives have had a recent change or upheaval or not: – What is truly important in our lives? It is easy to get caught up in the day to day priorities of work, teenagers/kids/family, our health, homes, social lives, finances, etc. But when it really comes down to it, what matters most? – How can we focus our lives in that direction, those priorities, rather than get caught up in all the minutiae? – What will remind us to live our lives through that prism on a day to day basis? Whether starting our day with a reminder of our key values or priorities or having reminders throughout our day, for example? – Where can I give myself more grace, patience, compassion in my life? Especially when things don´t go to plan! – Where can I also give more space and grace for others? – What or who in my life right now does not need my attention or focus? |
I have also been marvelling about the many women (and men) who are part of the sandwich generation – caring for elderly parents/relatives and their offspring too. Obviously attempting to manage these responsibilities and the many others we take on requires a lot of organisational skill, stamina and resilience. I know it has been said many times before but self-care is so, so important for us all, but particularly when caring for others (and is not a one-off activity).
Learning and remembering to put ourselves on the to-do list, delegate more, let some things go, allow ourselves to also find moments of peace and joy in each day too are just as important as the caring. Giving ourselves permission to find ways to enjoy our lives, shake things up a bit and not get stuck in a rut, be a victim or martyr. All with bucket loads of self-compassion and love too.
Yes, it sounds like a lot, especially when we can feel like we have so much going on already. But, we are important too. Our lives matter. We all matter.
This is partly why I love being a coach and mentor, I see week in and week out how, regardless of how we feel, none of us are ever really alone. Even if we can sometimes believe that our situations are unique, hard, even impossible; I firmly believe we share so many common experiences and emotions and that we are never alone in them. Feeling alone is one of the challenges of our time. From my experience and with others, we need to be kinder to ourselves, remind ourselves of our shared humanity and allow ourselves to be a bit more vulnerable too (with people who feel safe to us).
Ultimately, we are all looking for connection and are here to support each other, learn, grow, nurture ourselves and each other. That is what life is about, connecting with ourselves, others, sharing our humanity, our challenges and our triumphs. This is what connects us all and trumps loneliness, shame, guilt, fear, worry. Opening up even a little bit to share what is going on for us so often leads to giving others permission to do the same. It does take courage, but that is how beautiful things start and unfold.
If you are finding anything tough (big or small) in your life right now, do feel free to send me an email – hello@emmathornelees.com or comment below. I would love to hear from you and maybe help find another perspective – obviously no strings attached.
Wherever you are and however you find yourself today, I hope you can look after you as much as you look after everyone else in your world.
Take good care and much love,
Emma
PS – Please do share your thoughts, comments, questions below, I always LOVE to hear from you!
Images: Sara Cervera and Ch_pski on Unsplash